We have a couple of options positions that expire on Friday, April 15 and I just want to explain to the newbies how to best maximize their profits.

These include:

The S&P 500 SPDRs ETF (SPY) April 15, 2016 $182 puts

The? SPDR Gold Trust (GLD) April 15, 2016 $109-$112 vertical bull call spread

My bet that gold would rise, despite all market conditions, proved dead on accurate. This makes our third consecutive win with the barbarous relic. All we need now is another substantial dip so we can get back in, rolling our options up and out.

The S&P 500 (SPY) is another story. We originally purchased this as a hedge against our many deep-in-the-money (SPY) call spreads, all of which proved profitable. My plan was to take profits on the $182 puts on the next dip if the market, and bring in profits on both the long and the hedge.

However, the dip never came. What ensued was the strongest and sharpest move up in market history. The market didn?t take in a single breath. As a result, our (SPY) April 15, 2016 $182 are going to expire worthless, shaving some 4.87% off our 2016 performance.

That?s a hit and a half!

Netting it all out, we still managed a profit on our (SPY) longs. It took a once a century event to deprive us of our bragging rights.

Those once a century events are darn hard to call.

Provided that some 9/11 type event doesn?t occur by Friday, the (GLD) position should expire at its maximum profit point. In that case, your profits on this position will amount to 12.35% in 18 trading days.

Many of you have already emailed me asking what to do with these winning positions. The answer is very simple. You take your left hand, grab your right wrist, pull it behind your neck and pat yourself on the back for a job well done.

You don?t have to do anything.

Your broker (are they still called that?) will automatically use your long $109 call position to cover your short $112 call position in the April (GLD), cancelling out the total holding.

The profit will be credited to your account on Monday morning April 18, and the margin freed up.

If you don?t see the cash show up in your account on Monday, get on the blower immediately.

Although the expiration process is now supposed to be fully automated, occasionally mistakes do occur. Better to sort out any confusion before losses ensue.

I don?t usually run positions into expiration like this, preferring to take profits two weeks ahead of time, as the risk reward is no longer that favorable.

But we have a ton of cash right now, and I don?t see any other great entry points for the moment. Better to keep the cash working and duck the double commissions. This time being a pig paid off handsomely.

If you want to wimp out and close the position before the expiration, it may be expensive to do so.

Keep in mind that the liquidity in the options market disappears, and the spreads substantially widen, when a security has only hours, or minutes until expiration. This is known in the trade as the ?expiration risk.?

One way or the other, I?m sure you?ll do OK, as long as I am looking over your shoulder, as I will be.

This expiration will leave me with a very rare 90% cash position. I am going to hang back and wait for good entry points before jumping back in. It?s all about getting that ?Buy low, sell high? thing going.

I?m looking to cherry pick my new positions.

Take your winnings and go out and buy yourself a well earned beer. Or use it to pay your 2015 income tax bill due Monday, April 18.

Well done, and on to the next trade.

Looking for the Next Whopper